Main description:

Why do some marriages grow stronger in the face of conflict or stress while others dissolve? In this book, two pioneering researchers present a groundbreaking theory of how mutually responsive behaviors emerge-or fail to emerge-in relationships. Illustrating their findings through the vivid stories of four diverse couples, the authors explore how conscious considerations interact with unconscious impulses to foster trust and commitment. Compelling topics include why marriages have such different personalities and what makes partners truly compatible. Also discussed are implications of the model for helping couples sustain satisfying relationships and improve troubled ones.

Contents:

Foreword, Harry T. Reis 1. Motivating Responsiveness: Why a Smart Relationship Unconscious? 2. Procedural Rules for Responsiveness: The Motivation-Management Model 3. Trust: When to Approach? 4. Commitment: How Close a Connection? 5. The Situational Risks: Seek Connection or Avoid Rejection? 6. The Rules for Seeking Connection: Increase and Justify Own Dependence 7. The Rules for Avoiding Rejection: Withhold Own and Promote Partner Dependence 8. Relationship Personality: Making Certain Rules a Habit 9. Being Swept Away: How Passionate Love Makes It Natural to Connect. 10. Being Mowed Over: How Real Life Makes It Natural to Self-Protect 11. How the Person, the Pairing, and the Context Make (or Break) Relationships 12. A Practical Guide for Relationships